texterday

[Cute Loops]

View: RAD AD
:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-::-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:
: Call The Upside Down BBS at (201) 398-2953 300/1200 Baud 10 megabytes :
:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-::-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:

Date: 04-20-89 09:34:17 -0600

Hello.

Pass it on.

This is an actual alert to IBM Field Engineers that went out to
all IBM Branch Offices. Funny stuff!!


__________________________________________________________________

Abstract: Mouse Balls Now Available as FRU (Field Replacement Unit)

Mouse balls are now available as FRU. Therefore, if a mouse
fails to operate or should it perform erratically, it may need a
ball replacement. Because of the delicate nature of this
procedure, replacement of mouse balls should only be attempted by
properly trained personnel.

Before proceeding, determine the type of mouse balls by examining
the underside of the mouse. Domestic balls will be larger and
harder than foreign balls. Ball removal procedures differ
depending upon manufacturer of the mouse. Foreign balls can be
replaced using the pop-off method. Domestic balls are replaced
using the twist-off method. Mouse balls are not usually static
sensitive. However, excessive handling can result in sudden
discharge. Upon completion of ball replacement, the mouse may be
used immediately.

It is recommended that each replacer have a pair of spare balls
for maintaining optimum customer satisfaction. Any customer
missing his balls should suspect local personnel of removing
these necessary items.

To re-order, specify one of the following:

P/N 33f8462 - Domestic Mouse Balls
P/N 33f8461 - Foreign Mouse Balls

X-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-X

Another file downloaded from: NIRVANAnet(tm)

& the Temple of the Screaming Electron Jeff Hunter 510-935-5845
Rat Head Ratsnatcher 510-524-3649
Burn This Flag Zardoz 408-363-9766
realitycheck Poindexter Fortran 415-567-7043
Lies Unlimited Mick Freen 415-583-4102

Specializing in conversations, obscure information, high explosives,
arcane knowledge, political extremism, diversive sexuality,
insane speculation, and wild rumours. ALL-TEXT BBS SYSTEMS.

Full access for first-time callers. We don't want to know who you are,
where you live, or what your phone number is. We are not Big Brother.

"Raw Data for Raw Nerves"

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Bulletin to print, <L> for list, or <RETURN> to exit? 

[Cute Loops]

48

File: AN APPLE FOR THE CAPTAIN

Read 22 times

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An Apple For The Captain
InfoWorld -- October 1, 1984
By Stephen Wozniak
Word Processed for SF][ by BIOC Agent 003
-=*=-=*=-=*=-=*=-=*=-=*=-=*=-=*=-=*=-=*=-=*=-=*=-=*=-=*=-=*=-=*=-=*=-=*=-=*=-

The best prank I've seen with the Apple was played by Cap'n Crunch. John
Draper, one of Apple's first employees, was responsible for designing a
telephone board for us. Much more than a modem, the board could send
touch-tone or pulse-dial data; it could also transmit any tones that were
programmable down the line, listen for specific sounds, and a bunch of other
things.

At one point Draper was motivated to crack WATS extenders. A WATS extender
is used when a company has incoming and outgoing free 800 lines. Company
executives call in on the incoming 800 line and tap out a four-digit code,
which gets them on their company's outgoing 800 line. They only system
protection is the four-digit code.

It would take a long time to dial 10,000 phone calls manually, searching for
the extender code. But Draper had designed this new telephone board, and he
knew a bunch of companies that had WATS extenders. He programmed the Apple to
call the company on its 800 number, automatically get to the WATS extender,
type out a four-digit code, and check to see if the attempt succeeded or
failed. The Apple with the board would listen to all the tones on the phone
line to determine when it was ringing, when it went to the WATS extender, and
so on.

It took about 10 seconds for the Apple to dial the call and try a new
four-digit code. The Apple would restart and try again. And then try the next
number. It was able to dial about 5,000 calls a night -- the average number of
calls to crack a WATS extender. Draper cracked about 20 WATS exteders,
averaging one a night.

The city of Mountain View, California, where he lived at the time, keeps an
index of how well the phone system is working. An average of 30% of all calls
made from the city don't go through. The month Draper was cracking the WATS
extenders, the index jumped to 80%! For that month Draper made more than 50%
of the calls originating from Mountain View, California, whose population is
60,000.... <>

[Courtesy of Sherwood Forest ][ -- (914) 359-1517]

-----End of File

[1-54, Last=48, Quit=Q] Read File #


[Cute Loops]

Filename: Guide to Being a Pimp

=====================
Your guide to become a Pimp
By The Flash
01/04/86
=====================

The first thing that you must do is decide that this is the thing for
you and that you will be able to handle this responsibility. Things that you
need to get or have is access to a motel or some good form of shelter in which
to house the items for sale. Next you should be located close to a large city
and have many contacts with students such as college or high school level.

You have to be in possession of an automobile. This is extermly necessary for
transportation of girls and you to get to partys. You must have understanding
parents that will let you leave the house on weekdays during late hours but not
later than 12 at night. Drug dealers; they are a big help in recruting the
girls. Girls that need some money to pay for their drug habbits are easy
targets. They will do anyhing to keep the supply of whatever that they are
hooked on continuing. [All children under the age of 18 and even 12 ar good
targets to take advantage of if they have drug habbits.] Tell your local pusher
that when he sells his goods that he should refer any young and fairly good
looking girls to you for some extra cash. [They will jump at the offer.]
employer. DO NOT TAE FREE SAMPLES!! The girls will only feel intimidated. You
what he thought.

Could the girl do better?
Will she improve with practice?
Did she resest only in the beginning, or also later?
What is your total over-all feeling of her?
Can you spread the word around about my services?

Thank You... See you again!

Once that you have a clientell set-up and a good list of girls, have a
Data-Base like Apple Works keep track of appointments and other things. If you
decide to continue with the bussiness, invest in Real Estate. That will also
pay-off in the end! Open up a descrete Whore-House.

This is NO joking matter, this is the exact thing that you should do.

If you decide that drug pushing is a better money maker, then do it, but
whatever you do, don't do what you sell. It is allways better that you do not
sample what you sell!!! Allways remember this! That was the down-fall of some
friends that I knew that had a few bussiness like that of which we are refering
to.

The final thing that you should do, to keep your investment going, is to
allways have the girls checked-up weekly. You do not want any deseases going
around. That may hurt you reputation.

Keep it clean, don't sample what you sell, and be curtios to the customer. If
you follow what I have told you, you will be able to relax in luxury in just a
year or less and afford anything that you want. This is what we call capitol
gain, something like Monopoly...

Later,

The Flash

Your Guide to Pimping
---------------------
by The Flash (C) 1986
---------------------
Part 1 of How to Make
Money the Illegal Way


===============================================================================

Part 2 of How to Make Money the Easy Way
By The Flash

Well, I think that the next best thing to being a pimp is a drug dealer
This is a more dangerous way to make money because you are dealing with more
dangerous people. To start it off, you must find your way to being a dealer
through other dealers. You have to get contacts and find out where your local
dealer is getting his stash from. I am not an expert on this subject but once
you get the connections all you have to do is be carefull of gready dealers that
do not want to share customers with you. The best place to pass off a few drugs
the you have been stocking up on, is the good ole' PARTY!!! This is the best
place that you can sell all kinds of things to everyone. Don't be afraid of the
cops in just the average friday night party, they are only there when they make
themselves noticable. When you see a few cop cars drive up to the house or
whatever, get rid of your stash if the situation looks real bad. Don't worry
about loosing a few bucks. It is much better to loose a little illegal money
than it is to get cought with it and the dope. If the party gets raided, and
they usually do, get the hell out of there via the back door leading into the
backyard. You must not run right to the cops who are o in the front of the
place. Get going to the neighbor's yard and keep going.

The party is a very good place to make a few bucks when you have gotten
a supplyer. Remember what I said about the first file... Don't do what you
sell, it will only get you fucked-up.

Later,

The Flash

Guide to Drug Dealing
---------------------
By The Flash (c) 1986
---------------------
Part 2 of How to Make
Money the Illegal Way


==============================================================================
GUIDE TO PICK-POCKETING
=======================

By The Flash
Part 3 of How to Make Money
the Illegal Way
(C) 1986


Here's the third part of a series. I think that I will start to write a
book on the subject.

The best place to find victims are in incredibally crouded places someplace
like a concert or a movie the theater, someplace that is dark or something. I
have found that the movies during everyone is leaving and bumping against
everybody. I also like the Factory of Nightmares, a holloween festival. The
only good concerts to hit are New-Wave, Pop or Jazz concerts because you don't
want to fuck with a bug ass punker that has 20 friends that can beat the shit
out of you.

Once you have found a target (victim), approach him or her. Wallets are
easy prey and in my opinion, are much easier to get. Besides, the male usually
carries more cash with him. Don't go for purses unless you have some sissors to
cut the strap connected to the purse (this makes it much easier.) Well, if your
victim is male and carries a wallet, push him away from you while you are
holding on to his wallet. Kinda fake that you bumped into him on accident;
well, you know. This way, he moved and his wallet didn't, it will still be in
your grimy little hands. HA HA.... He won't even feel it. If you are just
begining, quickly drop the wallet on the floor, and put your foot over it. If
the man turns around, just say if he asks about it, "Ohhh, looky there... Is
this your wallet that just feel out of ya pocket? WOW what do you know!!" You
will be off the hook. Later, and have fun;

The Flash
Call The Works BBS - 1600+ Textfiles! - [914]/238-8195 - 300/1200 - Always Open


[Cute Loops]

File: YIPL (TAP) ISSUE #1
Read 31 times

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YIPL (TAP) Issue # 1
June 1971
TAP ON-LINE Courtesy of BIOC Agent 003 & Sherwood Forest ][ -- (914) 359-1517
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Published June, 1971

THE YOUTH INTERNATIONAL PARTY LINE'S FIRST ISSUE

We at YIPL would
like to offer
thanks to
all you phreeks
out there. Most of you who are now
receiving this met us in Washington on Mayday,
where we distributed 10,000 promo flyers. So far
we have received over 50 responses, complete with
contributions, encouragement, and spirit. We may
not have done well percentage-wise, but the fact
that there are 50 people all over the country willing
to fight back speaks for itself. We are sure that from
the spirit of response, YIPL membership will really
skyrocket. However, more important than our numbers,
in our opinion, is the feeling and motivation for this
movement. The disappointment we feel toward Amerika has
turned to hatred as we saw the futility of the movement
to improve it, and to frustation as our outside efforts
were repressed and forbidden. But we did NOT turn our
backs on the movement for change. YIPL believes that
education alone cannot affect the System, but deucation
can be an ivaluable tool for those willing to use it.
Specifically, YIPL will show you why something must be
done immediately in regard, of course, to the improper
control of the communication in this country by none
other than the BELL TELEPHONE COMPANY.

THE CREDIT CARD CODE

The 1971 Credit Card system works as follows: The telephone number (7 digits)
of the number to be billed is followed by the secret number for the area
code of the number. They are listed below for several cities. At the end
of the number comes a letter that matches the sixth digit of the telephone
number. Many people look up the number of a large Company in the area and
use their number, cause using any old number might lead to THAT person
refusing to pay, and the Phone Company's hasseling the person to whom the
call was placed. They should say that others use that phone, and they don't
know anything. Fraud is illegal, so WE don't think you should make free calls.
This Code has already been printed in many underground papers, as you know.
Detroit-083 Boston-001 Phila.-041 1=Q 4=H 7=R 0=Z
Washington-032 San Fran-158 Pitts.-030 2=A 5=J 8=U
New York-021 Chicago-097 3=E 6=N 9=W

Example- 769-1900-069-Z (I.B.M. ,Amant,N.Y.)
!------^

TECHNICAL INFOMRMATION

As long as you're paying a bill, the phone company will tend to let you be.
We all know that you might have extra phones you want connected as freebees.
Not Western Electric phones, of course. Remember, the phone company "frowns
upon" hooking them up yourself, so wwe suggest you have a friend do it.

On-hook voltage:45V
Off-hook voltage:4.5V Your telephone line is usually a red and a green
Ring pulses: 90V wire. A yellow is sometimes used for ringing. Un-
screw your storebought phone on the bottom and
you will find a box with a bunch of screws on it. Connecting as in the
phone will keep it a secret from "Them".

--------------------------------------------------
! ***************************Disconnect this Bell wire(it is red)
! * **************** *<---------^^^^^
! * * ********** * * !
! --------- W W W W* ----*---*--------*---- !
! ( ) I I I I * O * G R##############################>
! ( Bell )R R R R ! O # Y## O ! !
! -------------E E E E ! # O ###############################*
! ! ! -----------------#####################################*##>
! ----------- ( ) ! !
! ! ( ) ! ! Connect the Yellow and the
! ! ( Dial ) ! ! Green wires together as one
! ! ( ) ! ! where they meet the main
! ! ( ) ! ! telephone wires.
! --- ( ) ----- !
! ( ) !

Ever wonder how those conference call makers that are sold on the commercial
market work? What they do is as follows:

DOUBLE-POLE, DOUBLE-THROW,>>>>> **********> TO PHONE CENTER-OFF, SWITCH ! * *****>
!--------!<< !-*----*-!
! I** I**************I ***I !
! * ! ! * !
! ********************* !
LINE 1 ! ! ! ! LINE 2
RED<******************************* ! ! *************>RED
! * ! ! * !
GREEN<***************************I **I ! ! I* I********>GREEN
! ! ! !
! ************************** !
! * ! ! * !
! I I**************I I !
!--------! !-!----!-!
ZZZZZZ<-1000 OHM,1 WATT RESISTOR

Flickering a switch up puts the phone on that number. Flicking it down puts
that number on "hold". The center position turns the first number off. The
resistor keeps the line "off the hook" electrically, so if it is on hold,
you will not be able to receive phone calls on that number. You line would
would appear "busy" to callers. Simple enough?

Yippies have been know to fool around with shit like this from time to
time without the permission of their local telephone company and even
though they usually get away with it, we at YIPL would never think of
advocating that thype of irresponsible activity. You should always check
with your local phone company to pay them any extra money that you might
be responsible to them for, before ever fooling around with your phone.
The phone company is our friend, and they are here to help you.

LETTERS TO THE EDITOR

Dear phreeks,
I'm a phreeks in need of information, so I can balance the score between the
Bell Kompany & the people. I enclose a dollar. Your brother in the movement-
H.M., Jamestown, N.D.

My dearest sirs:
Nothing pleasure me more than ripping off Mother Bell. Please send newsletter.
Encloses is $1 U.S. Also-a question...A few friends of mine make long distance
calls free from pay phone booths by holding the mouthpiece of the phone they're
using up to the phone next to it so the operator hears the change jingle and
makes the connection. I've tried it here in D.C. and the operator says the
cash hasn't registered (which of course it hasn't). Please tell why. Thanks a
lot. B.S., DuBois, Pa.

In our nation's Kapital there are the shiny new pay phones that work
electronically, instead of the ding (5c), ding-ding (10c) or dong (25c).New
ones have only one slot for depoit, and oon old ones your trick works, but hold
the handset CLOSE to that phone!
Editor

Send me the shit and don't rip me off (please) S.M., Winchester, Pa.

Dear Y.I.P.L.,
I thought you might be interested in a movement started here in Lancaster. The
movement is to have people who wish to see our troops out of Vietname this year
call their local phone company manager and have their phone removed. The
manager must be told why if it is to have any effect.Hopefully enough people
will feel strongly & give up phone service to begin showing up on the profits
of the phone company. This would push the phone lobbies to speak out (Bell
especially) to end our continued involvement there. If you can assist in any
way by encouraging this to take place in other areas it would be appreciated.
Thanks! J.G., Lancaster, Pa.

Hi People,
Here's my bill, send me shit on fucking the Bell System. Man do I need info on
this kinda shit thanks D.B., State College, Pa.

===============================================================================
OUR FRIENDLY PHONE COMPANY...

Our example of eavesdropptin that touches a vast number of Americans was
related to the Subcommittee by Joseph Beirne, President of the Communications
Worker of America. He revealed that the phone company does not limit its
invasions of privacy to assisting the FBI an other government tappers. He
pointed out that " as part of its training program, and as part of its cont-
inuing close supervision of its employees, the telephone industry has developed
equiptment for monitoring its operators, its service assistants, its commercial
office employees-in short, all of its employees who deal with the customer.
Such monitoring means, of course, that the customer is, in effect, monitored at
the same same time."

"An alert snooper is sometimes able to obtain the information he needs simply
by calling the telephone office and posing as a telephone repairman. Or, if
the tapper is a law-enforcement officer, here may be able to secure the
outright cooperation of the telephone company in the placing of his taps. In
Kansas City, the existence of just such an arrangement between the telephone
company and the chief of police was reveled."
The above two quotes were made by Senator Edward V. Long.

In the office we call it "The System", and use of the word "the" means dog-
matic finality. The wall comes up pretty fast when you start tampering with
the way things are done within The System, and you either slow down and do
things Bell's way or knock your brains out.-AT&T junior executive,spring,1967

Distributed by WAR TAX RESISTANCE/339 Lafayette Street/New York, N.Y. 10012

IN NEED

How do we communicate with our people serving time in Nam? WPAX has a way.
They're putting rock and sould and rap and education tapes on the air through
Radio Hanoi, who is donating free air time to broadcast these "subversive"
sounds, now banned by our government's stations. But WPAX need YOUR blank and
recorded tapes, and of course, bread. Send what you can. If you want ot
record your own show to be aired, ask them for details and they'll be happy to
supply them. WPAX, Box 410, Cooper Station, N.Y.,N.Y. 10003

SF][G9:ba003.022285

[Courtesy of Sherwood Forest ][ -- (914) 359-1517]

-----End of File


[Cute Loops]

------------------------------------------------------------------
The Complete Guide of:
Laying a girl V 1.1
------------------------------------------------------------------

Table of contents:
==================================

A. Purpose of the guide
B. The first meets
C. Phase I. - "I like you"
D. Phase II. - The body language
E. Phase III. - Actually doing it
===================================


A. Purpose of this guide.
-------------------------

Firstly, this isn't a joke guide. All the methods described
here are working, and with not too much difficulties.

Don't expect that you will be able to lay a girl in one week.
Not with this guide anyway. If you have the time, patience, and
some manners, you will succeed.


Dedicated to Limor, who helped me to compile it
without even knowing it...


B. The first meets
------------------

I believe you have a girlfriend you can experiment with.
If you don't, find one. For those purposes, every mid looking
girl will suit. Every one can owe a girlfriend, and it's not
the time and place to explain how to reach one. (maybe in the
next "completed guide of...").

If you don't have a girlfriend yet, at least try to achieve
a meet with one.

If you do have a girlfriend remember the following:

* Don't make a physical connection on the first dates
(don't kiss her goodbye and don't hug her )

* Let her talk. If she has a lot to say - just listen.
A node with the head and some leading questions will do.

* Where to go at the first time:

- movie (let her choose, but don't insist on doing so)
You can talk about the movie latter.
Pay for you both. (as it's obvious). If she's ok, she
will insist on paying on herself.
- go for a walk
- meet at one of your homes. (It's better on her home - she'll
feel more relaxed and free)
- party : if available
- School - only if you learn in the same school

* If you enjoyed her company, tell her so. Tell her that you
enjoyed, and you want to see her again. Before the end of
the meet, fix yourselves a new date (fix it on the same evening)
exchange telephones, ofcourse.

* Flatter her, but know your limits. Flatter to her nice sides.
(Every one has some). Tell her how nice she is.
Flatter to her looks (If you at least find her attractive).
Don't say to her "You are the most beautiful girl I ever so"-
It sounds non-natural.(She's Probably not.)

* If she plays (love-games) a little - please understand.
we'll close the bills later...

* Don't bother her with too much telephone calls. Be cool
at the first meets, or she'll take advantage over you.
Show her you interested, but not desperate.

The first physical connection. There are two ways establishing it:

* The spontaneous way: Kiss her goodbye (not in the first
date - she'll appreciate it if you'll have patience.)
In the following date take you hands together.
It's very romantic.
Dance with her in one of your homes. Dance is a kind
of hug, and it the middle of this slow song - kiss here.
(she might be shy in public, so understand her,
and do this critical steps in public garden or other
quiet place.)

* The non-spontaneous way: Lead her to non-public and
quiet place (i.e. garden) look in her eyes and silent
for a moment or so. She, understanding the moment, will
silent too. Approach her head with yours, and gently
kiss her a few times on her mouth. Hug her.
(BTW, this the recommended way).


C. Phase I - "I like you"
-------------------------

You (both) will start to say compliments to each other.
Don't say you love her if you don't feel anything to her.
Choose the right moment of doing so.

Imagine the situation: You tell her "I Love you.". She, likes
you very much, but the way to love is still long.
She will be in shocking situation. If she'll say "I love you too"
and she doens't mean it - you will both leave in lie.
If she'll be silent, you will Probably have bad feelings --
"She doesn't love me at all.."

You can say to her "I like you/your looks/your style."
This isn't strong as "love". Love is very strong word.
Don't use it when not needed.

Some guys say to their girls that they love them -
They think she will jump to the bed right a way.
Although she will try to show you her greetings, don't expect
to much. She's just a girl, and if she is between younger then 16.
she's Probably virgin.

Bring her flowers & presents some time - it will mean very much
to her. If you like to write, write her love letters.
Bring her audio cassette with love songs - she'll remember you
and connect you to them.


D. Phase II The body language
-----------------------------

You are now on the kings way.

You should talk about sex by this time. Ask her what she thinks
about it. (Don't involve doing sex with YOU). Ask her about
sex generally. Ask her what is the appropriate age for doing it.

Start investigating her body - only in one of your homes.
After you kiss her you should get to a situation where
you are laying one infront of another (on the bed)

Let your hand travel over her body Don't touch between her
legs - do the things in the order below.

Sneak you hand under her skirt and pat her back.
If she wears a bra put you hand under the stripe (the one
above her back - but don't open it - let your hand travel under
the bra surface and forward to her tits. Don't touch hard there -
it hurts. If she resists get you hand out of there quickly.
We will continue later with this. Give her 10 minutes of rest
from the last event. Talk about something else.
(Remember - Don't ask her why she resists. Just ignore.)

Another area you should quest is her ass. Pat it gently -
Stack you hand gently under her trousers and move your hand
more deeply every time. She'll Probably resist or do sounds
of disagreement. Remember - Even if she says she's not -
She like your touches there. By this time you should be friends
for 1-2 months or so - you know each other enough for those
games.

After few meets doing the above, you can try removing her bra.
The fastest you do it-the better she won't say anything.
Don't ask her too remove it by herself - You're on you own now.
after you opened it, don't ask her to totally remove it
(not at the first time, at least).

Now it's a very important moment. Remember to close the
lights, and get blanket from somewhere. Move you hand down to the
area of her cunt. (all with clothes, of course).
Pat her near it - but don't touch it directly. She'll bag in
her mind from you to do it. After a few minutes of doing so,
(Don't forget to kiss her all the times...she's not a sex machine)

Move your hand directly to there. You might feel some bones there
(and by this time you are wondering where the hall is)

Now...open her trousers. If she'll resist ask her what she
afraids from. What can possibly happen?
Start patting her cunt harder and with circulating movements.
(she is still with her underwear -- don't remove it!)
Have patience and control yourself.
If she'll like what you are doing there, and she's OK,
she will do the same to you. Don't hide your erect penis.
You can't. But she'll will be amazed from the quick reaction...

Now your hand is there - circulating over her underwear.
The best way of directly touching it is to "accidently"
insert a finger under her underwear. (Do it from her legs side)
She want resist...don't insert a finger in the hole -
It can hurt even if she isn't virgin. Remove you fingers from
there and insert full hand from her stomach side.
Lay your forehand on her hair, and let the fingers play a little
down there. Try to locate her clitoris - this is the mega power
station of emotions... (Open the little lips of her cunt and
travel up until they meet (the lips) there should be there
an small organ (About 2-3 cm) - remember:Don't touch there to
long - it is the most enjoying organ there, but it's not the only.

Try to concentrate on her (girls like attention) but if she
wants to pleasure you let her doing so. Remember - don't expect
to much from her. You are the leader in the bed.

Try to give her an orgasm. A few minutes of direct squeezes
at her clitoris will do. If it doesn't - ask her what will make
her good there. Let her instruct you, but don't insist on it.
If she has a serial of convulsions - she reached it (with your
help of course). After that she will feel free to do it to you...

You are both naked now, beside of your underwear (I hope).
Now - lay on her.
Curse the existence of your lower underwear - Loudly.
Lay her on her back. Massage her for 10 minutes. Kiss her back.
Now - Remove her underwear completely - she'll fill safe
because she is on her stomach. (No danger of actual intercourse).
Remove your pants. Lay on her (She still upside down -remember?)
She will Probably feel great and hot. Rub your penis against her
ass chicks. Say to her "would you like me to take some safety
percations?". She'll say "What do you mean?" answer her:
"I almost finished...".

If it doesn't enter, open her lips with your two hands and try
again. If she is virgin, it will Probably hurt her a little
so please be patient and if you are powerful, wait for the next
meet. (In the next meet throw your parents of your house for the
day). If it still hurts her, try to expend her virgin membrane
with your fingers. (There IS a hole there - even if she is totally
virgin. All you have to do is expend it a little).

Congratulations....


All the procedure described here (From totally start) Should
Take about 3 months. If you're thinking that you are moving
to quick, slow the rate.


John Smith.

************************************************
DOWNLOADED FROM
M&M'S PELHAM PUBLIC BBS
P.O BOX 334
PELHAM, NEW YORK 10803
300/1200 BAUD 24 HOURS
(914) 738-6857
************************************************


[Cute Loops]

SEX WITH SATAN
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
S e x W i t h S a t a n
------------------------------------------------------------------------------

by: Psycoe

call The Heavy Metal AE Line: (316) 684-0190 p/w=maiden 300/1200 baud

==============================================================================

First of all, this file is dedicated to my late dog, Cindy, who
without her influence, this file would never have been possible...



This file contains explicit sexual material, so dont jack off on the
keyboard...


My life had been very boring and drab. My subscription to Penthouse
and National Lampoon were about to expire so my life had no meaning. I had
been working mowing lawns, trying to get enough money to buy a hard drive...
since my ex-girl friend told me that hard things were nicer than floppy ones.
My parents were in California for US '84. My dad posted a note on the local
college job board that he needed a baby-sitter to watch his 15 year old son
and sit by the pool and suntan. We got many phone calls. My babysitter's
name was known to me only as "34-24-33".

The first days of my stay alone with the star of Debbie Does Dallas
was pretty boring (since it was that time of month and I am not a vampire).
The third day of my stay, my baby-sitter sat down and told me that she had
fantasies of molesting younge 15 year old boys who she babysits for. She
then proceeded to fufill our fate by sticking her soft hands down my pants and
unzipping me. She took off her shirt and bra, slacks and panties then leaned
over and told me she wanted to whisper sweet nothings in my rear.
She told me she had seen this on a Cheech and Chong movie. I
naturally went along with the fantasy. She took off my pants and placed
my 'joint' into her vibrating mouth. As soon as she began to choke, she
turned her head up and told me that she had one more fantasy to fufill with
me. I said that I would do anything for her. She tied me to the bed with
these handcuffs she had ripped off a fucking cop. She proceeded to spank me
and kept calling me 'bad boy'. Then, the little nympho took out a lighter and
set my cock on fire and told me not to smoke.

As I began to burn, I could faintly see her molesting my pet gerbil
while smoking a banana peel (which happened to be my pecker). I saw a violent
light, then a rainbow in the dark.
I was dead and in Heaven. I, being an active atheist, didnt believe
a damn thing about this. I saw some gates and opened them and proceeded to go
through the bars. A man with a cane stopped me and told me he could answer
any questions I had about Heaven. I proceeded to ask, "Sir, if I lived a good
life and kept Kosher, helped little old ladies across the street, do you think
I could get a cute little angel to piss on my face every Thursday night in
Heaven??" The man immediately hit me in the balls with the cane and said,
"There is no sex or corruption in Heaven, we all sit around and meditate
while listening to Culture Club tapes." I said, "Fuck this shit man, I
absofuckinglutley dont want to spend my eternity in this fag joint." I then
left the gates and jumped into oblivion through the clouds.
I fell through the sky and felt the earth seal around me. I began
to hear some faint music!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I ran towards the music and heard some Ozzy Ozbourne, Crazy Train Playing.
I immediately screamed "Now this is more fucking like it!" I took out my pack
of Menthol Players and lit it from the fire still pertruding from my cock.
A lady with extremely large breasts welcomed me into my new home. I saw men
orgying in the fire-laden streets with beautiful women. I jumped on a 21-
year-old woman and started gangbanging her with my cock of fire. She stood
up and screamed, "Why's your cock on fire??" I told her my plight and she
told me to go to Satan's wife.

I entered Satan's wife's house and signed the guest register. I
ran up to her room where she was actively masturbating with a broom stick.
I said "wow!!" She looked up in ecstacy and and asked me what she could do for
me. I blushed. She said, "Besides that!" I told her of my story. She said
she could help me quench the fires, but I would have to pledge my life to
winning over the virginity of younge school girls. She placed my cock in her
mouth and the fire was quenched by our ecstacy.
I asked her what her name was in my last breath of passion. She said
it was Lita Ford. I asked her if the lady who set my cock on fire back on
earth was one of her followers. She said her name was Wendy O. Williams.
I said "wow!!!!" After having another engagement of oral sex with her
steaming clit, I was wisped away to the land of virginity and high school
girls.
I found myself in a private school for young rich snobby girls. My
new identity was Angus. I had no last name, but never questioned the intent
of my master's wife.
I first began to hunt out my prey with the high school cheerleaders.
But, after noticing that they stuck to the floor while doing to splits, I
decided to go for less virtile girls. I seduced a young girl whose face
reminded me of an ancient memory. I took her up to my apartment and she said
she needed help with her geometry. I showed her my obtuse angle and she
showed me her acute one. As I tore off her bra, I noticed how undeveloped
she was. I took off her greasy panties and began to tounge her love channel.
She started to moan and said she couldnt believe I was doing that to her. I
just told her to sit back and relax. As I licked her wet spot, I noticed her
erect nipples and the tiny dew drops forming around her clit. I tounge fucked
her for 15 minutes then started to push my shaft up her. She started to moan
with pleasure. I proceeded to tie her to the bed with a pair of hot handcuffs
which I had borrowed from Wendy. I forced my victim's head down over my
pulsating dong. She began to gag a familiar gag. I let her head up for air
for a moment. Then to my surprise, she stuck her tounge out and it was
flaming. I said "oh, shit, not again!!!" She set my dick on fire.
As I proceeded to go back to my mistress in the underworld of sex, I
began to think of how good it would feel to get my pecker's fire quenched
again by Satan's wife's cool pulsating tounge. I entered Hell for a second
time and everybody greeted me with praises and started begging for sexual
vibrators to be sold in Hell for a lower price. I said "Why ask me??" They
told me it was all a test to see who would be the new number two. I began
to understand, as I remembered the ancient lyrics of an Iron Maiden song
named "The Prisoner." I lit another Play Xoceeded to my master's
flaming house in the depths of sex. I entered and Satan bowed down and kissed
my hand. He said I am the new number two since he is getting a little too old
to get his cock sucked on anymore by his wife. I took the position gladly.

I realized my new position. I am SATAN!!!!! I have unlimited powers!!
I begin to lead unsuspecting virgin girls to my domain. I conquer earth with
my flaming nympho's. I proceed to climb up the ladder of Heaven and gang bang
all the ladies there and say, "You could have been doing this all your life
instead of living in misery trying to draft more people into your false
faith!!!!!!!" I then pick up my brand new electric gibson challenger with new
tremelo bar and customized locking bolts with the perfect distortion. I
yelled the ancient and foreshadowing lyrics of my coming into power...


"Heaven's on Fire!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"


------------------------------------------------------------------------------

this is my life and this is my story...the next man you see caught on fire
could be me predicting my rule over all and the sexual reign on earth, hell,
and heaven.


--psycoe

the keeper of the
cock of fire!!!!!

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

death to all prudes and nonsexual pussy rockers!!!!! I am in power!!!!!!!!!!!!


++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

dont fuck with this file or someday I might go up and fuck your eight year old
daughter and make her a prostitute of my reign on 42 street!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

==============================================================================

Brought to you by:

[/] The Ascii Assassin [/]


(>
(>
(>

[Cute Loops]

texterday, dinformation seemed so far away
but now it seems as though it's here to stay
oh i believe in texterday

suddenly, i'm not half the hack i'de like to be
someones blacklisted my ISP
oh texterday came suddenly

why, she, posted that pic i don't know
she wouldnt say
so, i, just had to click now i long for texterday

texterday, my lady was such an easy trade
made just from ASCII, she had much to say
oh i believe in texterday

oh i believe in texterday
oooh oooh ooou ooou ooouooouooou

[Cute Loops]

.....

[Steev]

I am so praising the Digital God of yesteryear right now.

[Cute Loops]

The first documented example of "typewriter art" was done in 1898 by a woman named Flora Stacey. Her framed picture of a butterfly was published in the October 1898 edition of Pitman's Phonetic Journal. Her picture was done completely on a typewriter, with the butterfly composed of brackets, hyphens, points, oblique strokes, a single asterisk, and several "o"s.

http://mysite.verizon.net/bradwestcott/typebutterfly.jpg

ok, enough about butterflys....



http://mysite.verizon.net/bradwestcott/ascii_1.jpg

http://mysite.verizon.net/bradwestcott/ascii_2.jpg

http://mysite.verizon.net/bradwestcott/ascii_3.jpg

[Cute Loops]

http://mysite.verizon.net/bradwestcott/ascii_4.jpg

http://mysite.verizon.net/bradwestcott/ascii_5.jpg

http://mysite.verizon.net/bradwestcott/ascii_6.jpg

http://mysite.verizon.net/bradwestcott/ascii_7.jpg

[Cute Loops]

http://mysite.verizon.net/bradwestcott/ascii_8.jpg

http://mysite.verizon.net/bradwestcott/ascii_9.jpg

http://mysite.verizon.net/bradwestcott/ascii_10.jpg

[Cute Loops]

I had to ask... "do you, like, ever let people into your meat-locker to, like, uh,
you know, fuck around with the meat?"

The short-haired Korean man looked at me strangely from behind the counter.
Several of the waitresses glared in my direction.

"What you mean 'fuck around'?" the dumpy Korean asked.

"You know, like shovin' your dick in and out of the openings in the meat.
Then, like, getting a bunch of smelly, sticky cream of tubesteak all over the
junk that you grind into foodburgers," I informed him.

"Naw. We don't do that. You don't do that. Nobody do that," the imbecile
claimed.

"I do that," I began, "and as a matter of fact, most of my pals do that too.
We like it."

Overhearing our conversation, one of the waitresses gave me a sour look.
She seemed to be acting like she was getting sick. The cook and the other two
waitresses completely ignored everything except the random orders for patty
melts and double cheeseburgers.

"Look, I don't wanna do nothin' weird or strange or anything. I just wanna
fuck a bunch of meat that you got in your huge ol' meat locker. Listen, don't
any of you stupid fuckers understand what I'm sayin'?" I stated in an agitated
manner.

"Mister, people gotta eat my food. If you stick dick in food, no can eat.
Frank lose money. No can do," the Korean said.

"How much money would you lose, bright eyes?" I asked.

"Big thing of cow cost Frank $220 for a half," Korean-man said.

"Well, I wanna fuck around with about 13 of them. Let's see...that's about
$2860... look, I'll give you $3000 cash, RIGHT NOW, cause I like you an awful
lot, and also cause I'm fucking sick and tired or trying to talk to you
goddamn Korean half-wits."

The Korean seemed to ponder what I had said for a minute, or perhaps he was
just wallowing in incomprehension. One waitress went into the back-room and
loudly threw up.

"OK. But you give Frank money NOW."

I handed the money over to the fool and lifted up a section of the
counter and walked into the walk-in freezer.

"OK, you can fuck with 13 sides of cow, but leave cheese and other gunk
alone. OK?"

There was a wide variety of different kinds of food present in the walk-in
freezer. Many, many eggs and other fine foods. I could see containers of
pancake batter and butter. On the left was what I was after. Thirteen
beautiful sides of beef!

I started to get a hard-on just looking at the beef!

"You got your cash. Get out of here!" I shouted at the geek.

I casually waltzed up to the nearest beef-side and began to sweet-talk it.

"Hi, new in town? Ever get into Satanism? Shit, you're cute."

The cool beef did not reply.



--Original story by Don Bolles

Call The Works BBS - 1600+ Textfiles! - [914]/238-8195 - 300/1200 - Always Open


[Monkey Chunx]

I would have replied sooner but some 300-baud r0die was typing up the Holy Zoo BBS phone line all this time trying to get someone to let him into the 3l33t area

[Monkey Chunx]

Ha ha ha ha
I'm only partway done with this thread but can there be anything to top this?:

<<Don't expect that you will be able to lay a girl in one week. Not with this guide anyway. >>

[Monkey Chunx]

Ahahahahaha fuckin' tears shot outta my eyes! When I stop pissing myself and regain composure (give me 24-72 hours) I will post a top 10 for those of you who skimmed and missed out on the hidden gems of... yore? What the fuck does 'yore' mean, anyway?


http://dictionary.reference.com/search?q=yore

[Cute Loops]

i still remember the day i brought home my modem for my commdore64, ironically i spent so much money calling syracuse that i couldnt pay the bill and the phone co. cut me off, so i had to trek over to my moms with all my shit, when she got her bill i had to sell the C64, my cool race game (http://s64.emuunlim.com/gameinfos/commodore64carrace/commodore64carrace.htm), and my lime green monitor with all the cool ciggy burn marks on top to pay her bill

it was all self-defeating for me to say the least

that was 1983 and i didnt get another box until 1999, ive been in catch-up mode for 6 years now with folks who didnt spend all thier money on drugs and cheap wine in the meantime, thank God i re-found my wife, without her i wouldnt have the true necessities in life, such as real good head:cool:

[Monkey Chunx]

Remember autodialing all the BBS's in a row after school to get in and read the news before all the other folks (ok, guys, and the token girl) could?

This one guy Mino Taur had a hard drive that was frickin huge hooked to his Apple ][+. 60 megs!

First time I went to a "meet" to swap warez, it was like the cantina on Tattooine. Space mutants and freakazoids everywhere. And two girls. Wendy/the Seeress, and a smokin' hot half-asian chick, Athena/Lucid Dreamer. She was easily a 9. And a computer geek? Unbelievable!

Pre-internet I used to rock POPnet (http://mcquaker.org/popnet/article.html). You knew it was a busy evening when all 16 phone lines were occupied. It was then that I knew the internet would get invented.

One guy tried to invent an early sort of WWW network thing, called the Brain Garden. Another guy named Rax who was really arrogant and cynical worked out a way to send graphics over 300 baud, called Raxterm, which was basically a vector-graphics deal, but never went anywhere.

Then along came whoever really did - and apparently it ain't Al (http://www.snopes.com/quotes/internet.asp)

[Cute Loops]

hey chunx, sounds like yoo know more about texterday than i doo, theres alot of good archived stuff here (http://www.textfiles.com/), yoo might find +ofit interesting:cool:

[Monkey Chunx]

I don't know about dat... I just remember more than you did... kinda like the 60's :)

[Cute Loops]

heylo,

today in order to alleviate boredom and depression i stumbled a neighbors wireless DSL network, it has no encryption and features a couple shared drives with write access, yes.........

hey.. the way i look at it im doing someone in the hood a public service here

which is to leave heylo.txt

"heylo, thank u 4 allowing to visit ur unsecured home network, the recipes sound yummy"

[Cute Loops]

all at once the clouds were parted

light streamed down in byteous unbroken beams

a voice said....

"im not impressed with your petty antics"

i quoted keef....

"We are curious animals, and we are not concerned about your petty morals"

the light receded.. muttering something about correction fluid and wafers

[Monkey Chunx]

http://www.ganjatron.net.nyud.net:8090/misc/scanjet/scanjet-elise2.mpg

[Cute Loops]

:D

http://www.bigwebguy.com/videos/video_computer_system.mov

[Steev]

http://www.warprecords.com/video.php?mvf_id=98